See How the Celebrity Gossip Machine Recycles it Own Waste

by twilighter

Today brought us yet another great example of how the celebrity gossip machine recycles its own waste.  Now Magazine, a well known British tabloid had the following headline:

“Kristen Stewart and Liberty Ross’s shock summit: Kristen Stewart agrees to meet her fling’s wife

Key highlights:

Kristen Stewart has sensationally agreed to a face to face with the wife of Rupert Sanders – the man she cheated on Robert Pattinson with.

Liberty Ross asked for a meeting to get closure.

Liberty wants to know when it started and when Rupert last tried to contact her.

‘She’s also got awkward questions about exactly what they did together because she’s still struggling to trust Rupert.’

Aside from the fact that this is an absolutely ridiculous story and its relies on the usual unnamed sources, does it ring a bell? Sound familiar? How about this story from the RadaronLine on July 27, 2012, just a week after the “so-called” cheating scandal broke.

“Kristen Stewart Cheating Scandal: Rob Pattinson Wants ‘Man To Man’ Talk With Married Director

Key Highlights

Robert Pattinson is “curious about what really happened” and therefore wants to talk to Rupert Sanders

Rob wants to have a man to man chat with Rupert to find out exactly what happened between him and Kristen,” a source close to the Twilight star exclusively told

Rob feels Rupert would be honest with him.

He’s  not ready to talk with Kristen, it’s too painful, so he’s going to Rupert.”

Yeah right, talk with Rupert instead of Kristen. But that’s the good stuff you get when you have an “exclusive” source as opposed to a run-of-the-mill whore of source.

Aside from the fact that this again was an absolutely ridiculous story and it again relies on the usual unnamed sources, albeit an exclusive one, does it ring a bell? Sound familiar? How about this story from the Daily Mirror on July 31st, 2012, just a week after the “so-called” cheating scandal broke.

“Robert Pattinson ‘wants to meet Liberty Ross to find out truth Kristen Stewart and Rupert Sanders relationship’

Key Highlights

Robert Pattinson is said to want to meet Sander’s wife Liberty Ross to find out if their tryst was a ‘momentary indiscretion’ or if it had gone on for months.

Robert is also said to be ‘dreading’ the upcoming promotional tour for the final film in the Twilight saga.

It is eating him up that he has no choice but to see her again because of work. His humiliation is total.'”

Wow this one must really be true, they have multiple sources including one from Perez Hilton, oh baby oh baby.  But alas, none of them are “exclusive sources” so take two points away.

You see the pattern here?  There  is a kernel of an idea: that one of the affected parties needs to have a one-on-one confrontational meeting with one of the other parties so that they can gain information about what happened and reach metaphysical “closure” from the scandal.  Embellish away, stir in a few unnamed sources and voila, one crappy false story becomes three.  And then all of the other accomplices in the celebrity gossip machine pick it and report on it as well as creating their own versions and mutations. And so it spins on into the cyberspace wastebin.  The sad thing is that it is stunning how many people believe this crap, if looking at the comments to them is any gauge.

So what will the next story look like?  Here goes:


Kristen Stewart is holding out hope that she can repair her damaged relationship with Robert Pattinson, but now realizes that she can’t reach closure and move forward in that relationship until she meets with Rupert to understand the details of her affair with him.

Speaking with an exclusive, unidentified source, we have learned that Kristen wants to know when the affair started, whether Rupert made it to third base, and whether Snow White dies in the sequel to Snow White and the Huntsman. Those questions are eating her up inside our source reports.

But we have learned exclusively from yet another one of our army of sources through Kristen’s dog Bear, that Rupert and Kristen are having difficulty setting up this meeting because Kristen is always having sex with Robert and is never available.  Bear also told our confidant that her carnal behavior has made him so distraught that he has taken up electronic cigarettes.

Reliable sources indicate that this has infuriated Rupert’s wife Liberty Ross, a model and actress, a model and actress, really a model and an actress, as she too is trying to gain closure and move on.  A close personal friend to Liberty that loves to air her dirty laundry, has indicated that Liberty thought that she had dibs on the next meeting with Kristen, but now, hundreds of her frantic texts to Kristen remain unanswered. And she has been unable to settle this scheduling issue with Rupert despite months of heart wrenching couple’s counseling.

Meanwhile, a still distraught Robert Pattinson is noticeably absent, and refuses to either deny or confirm the story.  His representatives confirm that he is off on a nicotine and crisps bender trying to nurse an aching appendage.

Where will it all end? “

Yep, that’s how the celebrity gossip machine recycles its refuse. Over and over and over again.  That’s what my exclusive source has told me.

But there is still another story left here.  How about the one where Kristen, Robert, Rupert, and Liberty all get together to find solace and closure.  But I’ll leave it to you to get a jump and an exclusive on that one.  You have seen how it’s done.  Just find yourself a mythical source and make it up.  That’s what they do.


14 Responses

  1. Idiots!!! Don’t they have something better to do than printing lies!!!

  2. Hey< I had quit going to GC and its your fault Twilighter that I went after almost 2 weeks! Someone on twitter said you were on the other day and then the next I think. I have no idea why I went on today but there is an interesting post on the Rob is set to dump k board by someone name inlovewiththeirlove

    • Yes I have seen it. Kind of a long rambling diatribe making a lot of claims that aren’t backed up. Even though it agrees that the photos were staged and altered, I hate this kind of stuff. Plenty of assertions with few of them backed up with anything meaningful. Kind of makes all of us who are trying to cogent arguments look bad and like a bunch of crazies. And who knows, maybe thats the whole idea.

      At any rate, we got a request to post it here for reaction comments but it is lengthy and would clog up our comment log. But if anyone is interested, you can take a look at it over at GC as Nena describes and get back to us here if you want to comment on it.

  3. I foresee a summit meeting among the four of them involving frequent use of the word “closure,” which takes place in a Mini-Cooper, and turns unexpectedly into the world’s most cramped and uncomfortable small-scale orgy. Tabloids cover the event as described by a source close to the situation. Liberty Ross issues a heartfelt apology, through Motor Trend Magazine, to BMW expressing her regrets for the effect this may have on their public image and their 2013 sales.

    • LMAO. Now that’s using your imagination. I think you have a future at the Enquirer. Why not just go straight to top! 🙂

  4. Twilighter your post on the scandal was hilarious. Made my day. You are so right about how they rehash and spin reports from one gossip mag to another. Not only that but Bonnie will take what a poster says and turn it into an article backed up with an exclusive source or a friend said about them. I was looking at some old articles on the UK Mirror site and they were saying that Rob demanded that Kristen write a public apology to him and he sent it to People. The mags in the US said he was devastated with her putting an apology in people. The spin thay all use is mind boggeling to me. I read your comment on Hollywood Lies tonight and had to come here to see what your site was all about . Thank you for researching this whole incident and reporting the truth. Just need to add. Can you tell me what this is about them breaking up on February 14? Where did that come from?

    • Welcome to our little of reality and thanks for your comment. As to the Valentine’s Day deadline, pure fantasy. Remember tabloids + unnamed sources=BS, no exceptions. Doesn’t matter if the spin is positive Rob/Kristen or negative. That the way the celebrity gossip machine functions.

      And think about. What warped mind sets a deadline for deciding what they are going to do with a relationship on Valentine’s Day? And why so long? the whole thing is more than ridiculous just like this five month long “trial” reconciliation. Put it where it belongs, in the trash heap.

      • The best way to counter this is to hire some private detectives and put them on these stupid so called editors and reporters tails to find out what their private life is like and expose it for every one to see and comment. Make it hard for them to go out in public. You won’t find too many journalists (?) willing to work for tabloids.

      • Valsan: Turning the gossip-mongers into de facto celebrities! That would truly make the punishment fit the crime. Unfortunately, it would take both money and callousness, two things gossip editors will always have in greater quantity than most of us.

    • Chance, If these kids get married, then the talk will be about their divorce. And the case will be settled at Hague. The American President and the British Prime Minister will represent them. The Grand Jury will consist of Editors from the tab/webloid.

  5. Badger,
    That is the saddest part. People with money and power gets away with almost very thing. Let us wait and see if Kristen & Co. can do some thing about it.

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