Buckle in, this is going to be a long one.
The cyber ink had just barely dried on our last such fabricated story (Liberty Confronts Rob & Kristen at Coachella) before the celebrity gossip machine was at it again. Doing what it does best: generating bs stories and spewing them across the internet irrespective of reality or truth. And as usual, relying on fabrication, faceless tweeters, unnamed sources, and questionable photographs. This time going back to one of their favorite BS fantasies: Kristen & Rupert Hookup Again.
Let’s start with the truth before we move on to the bull. On Thursday, April 18th, Robert Pattinson goes to the Malibu Seafood restaurant with some friends, including Marcus Foster, Jack Standon, a Foster band mate, and two female friends, Nettie and Michaela. See http://www.robstendreams.com/2013/04/new-pictures-of-rob-with-friends-in.html and a story from Eonline.com at http://www.eonline.com/news/409965/robert-pattinson-and-friends-enjoy-beach-day-dinner-in-malibu-without-kristen-stewart-mdash-see-the-pics?cmpid=rss-000000-rssfeed-365-topstories.
Close followers of Pattinson will recognize Nettie as a long time Pattinson friend and the long-time former girlfriend of Tom Sturridge, with whom she brokeup with in 2011. She was also a featured player in a tabloid account bemoaning how Rob and Kristen failed to celebrate Christmas Eve together in 2011. See http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2079477/Robert-Pattinson-spends-Christmas-Tom-Sturridges-ex-Nettie-Kristen-Stewart-LA.html. Sturridge subsequently moved on with Sienna Miller. In spite of that fact, Nettie remains close to Rob and also Kristen.
On Friday and/or Sunday, April 19th and/or April 21st, Kristen goes to Malo Taqueria at 4326 W. Sunset Blvd. in LA, a place she recently celebrated her birthday at with Robert Pattinson and a large gang of friends. Included in the entourage on the recent night(s) in question, are once again Nettie and Michaela. Following what was probably a pleasant but uneventful dinner, what haqs been termed as a “girls night out”, the entourage leaves the restaurant and awaits in the parking lot for their cars to be valeted. Kristen ends up in the passenger front seat of a black car with someone else behind the wheel. Hardly the fodder for a twitter melt down. But if you think this is how the story got reported, you are in for a serious awakening. The celebrity gossip machine is more than willing to make a tabloid mountain out of a pimple on a mole, let alone out of a molehill.
Now for the bull. On the afternoon of April 22nd, Eleanore Hutch of Hollywood Life began to report on a Kristen and Rupert reunion, relying primarily on an X17online.com photo of what appeared to be Rupert sitting in a black car outside of Malo Taqueria as Kristen and her friend approached it. The headline of the story was complete with a photo montage including what was claimed to be a photo of a “standard” Acura wheel, a picture of Rupert with his “dark Accura”, a blowup of the figure in the car captioned “Is this Rupert in his Acura?”, and a label stating that the main photo was of “Kristen Stewart leaving Malo Restaurant on April 21”. As if a label and them saying those things proves these things to be true. Yeah, right!
See the Hollywood Life image below.
The story continued as follows:
“The same day that Robert Pattinson was seen leaving California, Kristen was spotted getting into a car with a man who looks remarkably like Rupert.
Boy, this is really weird. Kristen Stewart went for dinner with some friends at LA restaurant Malo Taqueria on April 21, and afterwards she was seen getting into a dark car that looks like an Acura with a man who looks very similar to Rupert Sanders. And Rupert does happen to drive an Acura! This incident occurred on the same day that Robert Pattinson was seen leaving LA. Could Kristen possibly be in communication with Rupert again?
Kristen Stewart Hanging Out With Rupert Sanders?
Kristen, 23, was having dinner at the restaurant with a bunch of girlfriends — the same eatery where Rob threw her a romantic birthday party one week ago – and when she was leaving she was seen getting into this dark car, reports X17. And the man in the car bears a strong resemblance to her former director.
Did Kristen meet up with her old lover while Rob was away?
Perhaps they had a good reason to talk, especially since Snow White and The Huntsman 2 has been given the green light.
Kristen Stewart & Rupert Sanders: Their Devastating Affair
Kristen and 42-year-old Rupert’s affair scandalously came to light in the summer of 2012, and it has been conjectured that the two became close on the set of Snow White And The Huntsman. Kristen has already signed on for the sequel, while Rupert has been removed from the project.
It was a long and hard road for Rob and Kristen to get their relationship back on track, while Rupert and his wife Liberty Ross have since filed for divorce.
We sure hope that Kristen was getting into the car with a man that just looks like Rupert, and was not actually Rupert. But, it is weird that they drive such similar looking cars.
HollywoodLife.com has reached out to Kristen’s rep, who said that the man in question is not Rupert.
What do YOU think HollywoodLifers? Was Kristen with Rupert? Do YOU think she is meeting up with him?”
The nonsense, innuendo, and misstatements contained within this story are typical for the celebrity gossip machine. And Hutch is one of the more ridiculous examples of a tabloid journalist who works for that venerable patriarch of celebrity trash reporting, Hollywood Life. For example, even on the face of her own story, Hutch provides no proof that this event even happened on the 21st, although that was Hutch’s hoped for spin: that as soon as the cat was away the mouse was sure to play. But that spin was only as salacious as it was true. And despite the story’s assertions, Hutch utterly failed to prove that the car was even an Accura at all, let alone the one that Rupert has been seen in before, and that Kristen “hung out” with Rupert based on the photos. The car’s grill and lower bumper appears inconsistent with any of the Accura models and the characteristic Accura logo is missing from the middle of the wheel rim. And finally Accura doesn’t have a “standard” rim. A multitude of rims are available for each of the models. But why let the facts get in the way of a good lie.
Then there was also that little matter of Hutch’s claim that Rupert was Kristen’s former “lover” which is little more than bald speculation; that they became “close” on the set of SWATH which Hutch herself admits is conjecture; and Hutch’s speculative and unsupported claim that Rupert was “removed” from the SWATH sequel. The choice of these vague descriptive words is very intentional, designed to get people to infer things without any basis. Topped off by a disingenuous “hope” that maybe they were only getting together “to talk” because SWATH II had been green lighted. Please, Eleanor, we are not idiots.
By 4:30 p.m. EDT on the 22nd, Hollywood Life followed with another story which was essentially a regurgitation of its last one, a typical ploy of the celebrity gossip machine. This time there well known blogger, Hollywood Life Staff, was provocatively asking the same questions. It is not surprising that even at Hollywood Life, no one wanted to personally claim this piece of tripe by name.
By a little after 5:00 p.m. EDT, on April 22nd, GossipCop.com was already calling foul in a web debunk entitled “Kristen Stewart and Rupert Sanders “Reunion” Made Up By Hollywood Life”. Mincing no words, they claimed that “Jay Penske’s [Hollywood Life’s owner] comically misguided webloid has been (willingly) duped by conspiracy theorists who believe paparazzi photos of Kristen Stewart from over the weekend show a possible reunion with Snow White and the Huntsman director Rupert Sanders”. GossipCop also asserted that the actual dinner event had taken place on April 19th not on the 21st, before Rob had left town, and that “For years, HollywoodLife has mislead and misinformed its readers about Stewart and Pattinson”, recounting many examples, and that the site “remains a scandal-crazed, facts-poor joke.” Ouch! But typical, GossipCop itself was relying on unnamed sources.
As early as 7:30 A.M. on April 23rd, undeterred, X17online.com itself began to report on the “exclusive” series of photos that it claims were taken at the restaurant parking lot on the evening of April 21. Why it took them allegedly two days to get around to printing all of them on the 23rd is the first of many mysteries to their part of this nonsensical story. But the 21st was critical to their story as well, because Rob had in fact left for NYC earlier that day, leaving Kristen behind. X17’s delay was most likely due to their desire to hawk the dubious “Rupert” photo to Hollywood Life, for which they probably made a pretty penny. X17online has always straddled the line between being a paparazzi pack of dogs providing pictures to other celebrity websites and being a lesser known, two bit, junk online tabloid themselves.
X17Online coupled the release of the photos with a provocative headline “Was Kristen With Rupert Sanders Last Night?!, and an accompanying “story”. Yes, a story, as in a fictitious narrative shorter than a novel; a fairy tale; a lie or falsehood. Not to be confused with a story, as in a news article or broadcast, or a factual narrative of an actual incident or event. And remember, they were Eleanore Hutch’s original source. Below is their highly detailed and well documented account. [Editor’s note: inject a heavy dose of sarcasm here]:
Though the pictures numbered more than twenty, only three were truly significant. With the first two, X17online tried to establish that Kristen left the scene in a car driven by none other than Rupert Sanders. The first picture should seem familiar as it is the one that the Hollywood Life based their original story on. Captions on the these photos are mine.
Exclusive Photos – Was Kristen With Rupert Sanders Last Night?!
Apr 23, 2013 07:30 AM
“ Would Kristen Stewart actually hang out with Rupert Sanders again? Would she possibly go back to the relationship that temporarily separated her from Robert Pattinson and broke up Sanders’ marriage?
We snapped these exclusive shots of Kristen Sunday night at Malo Cantina in Silverlake — the same place Rob took her last week to celebrate her 23rd birthday and the guy driving the car that took KStew and her pals home looks suspiciously like Rupert and the car looks like his black Acura!
After RPatz left town on Saturday, was Kristen getting lonely?”
Yeah right. Now let’s look at the details. First, at least twenty photos were supposedly taken and displayed and yet we get one, ONLY ONE, that purportedly shows a person they claim is Rupert Sanders. And that photo above shows a face and forehead remarkably well lit within the otherwise darkened car, yet barely tall enough to peer over the steering wheel. Despite the fact that Rupert is over 6 feet 3 inches tall. It is also unclear if he is in the driver or passenger seat since we only see his head, no shoulders, or hands on the steering wheel, nothing.
Second,Kristen is in the company of two of Rob’s long time friends, and yet brazenly gets into Rupert’s car “with her pals” and drives off with him? Hmm. Sounds perfectly reasonable to me. NOT!
Third, but wait, there is more. Despite a picture showing Kristen in the passenger seat of a black car, X17’s paparazzi somehow manage to fail to photograph Kristen either getting into the black car or sitting in the car while the “Rupert” figure is still in it! Let alone driving her away, or taking her home. Imagine that, even in these days of the rapid fire DSLR cameras. These paparazzi must be the same guys that took the pictures for FameFlyNet.com last summer. [editor’s note: yeah, it’s time for another dose of sarcasm here].
Note also how the obscured driver looks remarkably long haired. (See the brown frizzy curls just beyond Kristen if it is Kristen). And why isn’t Kristen brightly illuminated like “Rupert” was. Ah, it must be a sparkly vampire thing.
And finally, why would Kristen have Rupert, of all people, pick her and her “pals” up at a very busy, very public Hollywood restaurant and then drive them home? After they stood around at the valet stand waiting for their car. See the picture below.
Yeah right. Why am I having such a sense of BS déjà vu. So much for X17online’s “evidence”.
Within another 90 minutes at 9:15 am EDT on the 23rd, Hollywood Life was already busy debunking their own story with claims of multiple new unnamed sources. That article, entitled Kristen Stewart: Truth Behind Her Meeting Rupert Sanders Look-Alike, was again authored by Hollywood Life staff, and began with the proud proclamation that “Sources close to the situation reveal the truth to HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY.” [editor’s note: Insert eyeroll here]
“An eyewitness at the restaurant tells HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY who the man in the dark car really is.
“That man is a driver, a valet driver,” the source says. “After he drove the car to the front of the parking area, he got out and the two young women in the photo got into the car. That young girl wearing glasses, Kristen Stewart, got into the passenger’s side. She is a regular here and very friendly.”
The witness also revealed that Kristen was also at Malo Taqeria on April 19 with a group of girlfriends, and she had a blast:
Kristen Stewart was here this past Friday night with a group of girlfriends, like about five or six friends. They stayed for a couple of hours and seemed to be celebrating something. They all sat inside and drank regular margaritas and cucumber margaritas. For dinner, they ordered a bunch of different items and split them, including enchiladas, squash blossom soft tacos and Baja-style shrimp tacos. Kristen is a regular customer, as are most of the girlfriends she was with. They seemed to be having a fun girls night out, laughing and smiling.”
The article continues with a claim that another source close to the situation revealed that “the former flames haven’t seen each other in a long time” and that there was “Not a chance in hell she was with Rupert yesterday or anytime recently.” They “backed that up with another source identified as a “separate insider” who insisted the former SWATH colleagues weren’t together. “It wasn’t him and she was not hanging out with Rupert”. “He has never visited the location, and they were not together.”
They then claimed a final source who revealed that “Kristen has no plans to see Rupert at all, that “they were not hanging out with each other” and “that ship and mistake has sailed.”
The article even included a link to a video file of Bonnie Fuller and Chloe Melas trying to explaining these latest developments. But they comically ended up looking silly, back paddling for the lives like two people about to go over Niagara Falls in one of those wooden barrels. If you feel compelled to watch, you can see it at http://www.youtube.com/watch?list=PLDovhwKa3P88xgg5xoOW3xBIAFL_DG82M&feature=player_embedded&v=VT42FfCIT-k . But I’ll save you a web hit and summarize with this transcription:
Bonnie: “Hi Hollywood Lifers this is your Holly Buzz with Bonnie & Chloe. And we’ve got some really interesting updated information on Kristen Stewart and the Rupert Sanders look alike. So Kristen was out with friends the other night at her favorite restaurant Malo Taqueria in California. It’s the same one that Rob threw her birthday party at. Now, ….everybody was buzzing because when she came out she got into a car and in the car was a man who in profile looked very much like Rupert Sanders.”
Chloe: (interrupting) And coincidentally he happened to drive a black Accura which is the same car that Rupert Sanders is photographed driving around in daily. So yunno there were many coincidences there. But we have learned from a source at Hollywood Life.com ….”
Bonnie: (interrupting) “Multiple sources”
Chloe: (interrupting) “That this is not Rupert Sanders! So ,Ya!” [Insert Chloe’s gleeful clapping here, squealing like the high school freshman she is forever destined to be] .
Bonnie: No, we’re really happy we did a lot of investigating over night. We found sources who were actually at the restaurant that night and who knew who the driver was. It is a valet who works there after six o’clock at night. And he does apparently look a bit like Rupert Sanders. And we also found out from multiple sources that Kristen wants nothing to do with Rupert Sanders, that he is in her past, she has moved on, she will never go back there, and will never make a mistake like that again.
Chloe: Well, it looks like it’s just a bunch of ah, very ironic coincidences that happened. But…
Bonnie: (interrupting) But we got to the bottom of it.
Chloe: (Interrupting) We got to the bottom of it. So for more on the Robert Pattinson-Kristen Stewart-Rupert Sanders triangle come to Hollywood Life.com
OMG, I haven’t seen reporting like since the Watergate scandal. Bring on the Pulitzer Prizes. But then again, query why Bonnie and Chloe hadn’t done all that “investigating” before they allowed this ridiculous story to appear on their website, why they were still relying on unnamed, unidentified sources, and why they hadn’t bothered to prove the car was even an Accura, let alone the wheel of an Accura. Let alone that they had their dates wrong. Et cetera, etcetera, etcetera. But despite Hollywood Life’s recantation, the damage had already been done.
Somewhat remarkably, most of the rest of the celebrity gossip machine had been in no hurry to pick up this piece of dog shit. Even the professional liars have some standards I suppose. But have no fear. Once websites such as Hollywood Life, Gossip Cop and X17online.com became engaged, many more were sure to pick up this piece of crap and run with it. And add yet more scintillating details.
Within another day, Tracy Gee of thehollywood5.com was blogging the following story:
Kristen Stewart got photographed hopping into Rupert Sanders cheat-mobile AGAIN?
While Robert Pattinson was in New York handling some business, Kristen Stewart was in LA doing something that looked oddly familiar.
Kristen was hanging out at this Mexican restaurant with some girlfriends but she took off with another man. The paparazzi snapped photos of her getting into the passenger seat of a black car that looked like the same vehicle that was busted cheating with Robert in… And the guy behind the wheel looked like dirty director Rupert Sanders too.
Is she taking a ride in the cheat-mobile again? Did she really run back into the arms of her affair the minute that her boyfriend left town? I wouldn’t put it past her.
Kristen’s rep refused to comment on the situation but they did throw this theory out there to help her save face. It was just her girlfriend’s car and that was just a valet that was driving it.
But let’s be real. Kristen’s about to get busy with the upcoming Snow White and the Huntsman sequel… but Rupert’s not going to be there to, um, keep her busy this time. He was dropped from the project. So now they have to sneak in some cheating time while they can since they can’t play during work hours anymore.
Robert did land back in LA last night and he didn’t look pleased.
See the pics for yourself right HERE. What do you think? Guilty or innocent this time?
So now X17online’s “Rupert picked up Kristen and her pals and drove them home” suddenly morphs into Kristen was with her friends but then “took off with another man”. It’s truly amazing how tabloids can bend even a lie.
Which prompted me to comment on their blog, thusly:
Wow. You guys are really scumbags when it comes to truth. First of all, this car is so-calledly an Accura, not Kristen’s Mini Cooper. If you are going make up lies, at least try to know the false facts of this so-called cheating scandal. Second, as for Kristen’s rep, she has refused to comment on this ridiculous assertion, as she always does regarding tabloid tripe. Although many others have already confirmed that the guy driving the car that night was a valet and the car in fact belonged to a female friend Kristen was with that night. And as for “sneaking” in some “cheating time”, being picked up in plain view at a busy Hollywood restaurant after having stood around at a valet stand outside, is hardly consistent with sneaking. And as for Rob, he looks pissed because as usual he can’t even walk out of an airport without being hounded by a pack of paparazzi scum that websites like you support.
So let’s get real. I wouldn’t put it past you to make up BS just to try to get webhits on your pathetic website. Funny thing is, I’m your only comment, but you are too gutless to print it because it calls you out on your nonsense. Have a nice day.
And just as I predicted, it was pretty funny as thehollywood5 were too gutless to retain my comment. They immediately removed it and to this day still don’t have another comment on their so-called story. And as for the paparazzi “snapping pictures of her [Kristen] getting into the passenger seat”, if they did take those photos we sure haven’t seen them yet as X17online never provided any such photos.
Although the story had been slow to get traction, eventually the celebrity gossip machine did its usual thing and divided into three seemingly completing camps: She definitely didn’t hookup with Rupert; she definitely did hook up with Rupert; and maybe she hooked up with Rupert, what do you think?. All based on the same old X17online.com account with some embellishments, and on the same set of pictures. For some examples of each see: NO- New York Daily News and Now Magazine; YES- The Mirror and Celebrity Dirty Stinking Rotten Laundry.com (yeah, them again); and MAYBE – The Examiner.com, the San Jose Mercury News, Marie Claire, and Sugarscape. And there was even a fourth version, she was hooking up with a new guy that just happened to resemble Rupert, provided by those mental giants over at The Stir.
And just like at the dump where garbage draws flies, this story just kept decomposing. With new stories about how Rob raced back from NYC to confront Kristen about the story, how Rob appeared glum at the airport in LA upon arrival because of the rumors (probably more likely due to the fact that he was being harassed by dozens of paparazzi), and as recently as April 30th when the internet once again lite up with a story claiming that Rob faked out Kristen by making her take a “mock” lie detector test about the Rupert reunion as a joke. That last one was picked up by several other sites, some even having the audacity to claim that making her take the test actually happened and wasn’t meant as a joke. All of those accounts were debunked by Rob and Kristen themselves, as they resumed their everyday activities together like nothing had happened including being papped in a convenience store seeking a candy and Snapple fix. Ah, Carl Bernstein would be turning over in his grave.
Which takes me back to a question I asked before in my last post. Why does anyone ever believe anything that comes out of the mouths of the celebrity gossip machine. That is truly a mystery that no one can answer. For another tale of the celebrity gossip machine lying its face off, see It’s Time to Put Something to Rest: US Magazine’s Account of the Kristen Stewart “Cheating Scandal” is Fabricated at http://wp.me/p2JqVX-vD.
And so until next time, keep calm and carry on.